Free PDF Dave Barry's Book of Bad Songs, by Dave Barry
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Dave Barry's Book of Bad Songs, by Dave Barry
Free PDF Dave Barry's Book of Bad Songs, by Dave Barry
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About the Author
Dave Barry is the author of many bestsellers including Dave Barry's Complete Guide to Guys, Dave Barry Turns 40 and Dave Barry Is Not Making This Up. A wildly popular syndicated columnist, Barry won the 1988 Pulitzer Prize for commentary. He lives in Miami, FL.
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Product details
Paperback: 94 pages
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing; 1st edition (March 15, 2000)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0740706004
ISBN-13: 978-0740706004
Product Dimensions:
5 x 0.3 x 7 inches
Shipping Weight: 4.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.4 out of 5 stars
181 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#388,281 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
Hilarious. I have always made a hobby of picking on senseless, tasteless and/ or unintelligible song lyrics...since I was a little kid. So this book was right up my alley. I remember lots of the songs that Dave Barry covers...like the Hispanic song he quotes as "One Ton Tomato"...when I was in New Zealand 10 years ago, my workmates and I debated these lyrics, which we were cursed with having stuck in our heads due to a Chilean group who performed outside our building at lunchtime. Our verdict was "One Ton of Mayo" in the end - a running lunchtime joke: "what are you having today, Tom?" "Oh, toasted cheese sandwich I think...with one ton of Mayo!"He also forgot a few notorious ones. Most notably, Alphaville's Victory of Love, for lazy rhyming when they couldn't find any suitable words" "she's an investigator; she's like an elevator" (or is it "alligator"???). Roxette's She's Got The Look, for making no sense whatsoever ("...she's a juvenile scam, loving like a wild dog, she's got the look"), and Tinie Tempah for Miami to Ibiza, the song with something to offend absolutely everyone: "I've got a black BM, she's got a white TT, she wanna see what's hiding in my CK briefs, so I say wear suspenders and some PVC, so I can film it all up on my JPC..." You get the picture...thinly veiled though the crass lyrics might be by the artist's use of confusing acronyms. Except for the final verse, which is clear as day: "If you (ethnic slur) are balling, then man, I must be FIFA..."Yes, whether a song is bad or good is a matter of opinion. But Mr. Barry's detailed essay on this subject is spot-on. Awesome...six stars. Except now, I can't get the refrain "one ton of mayo" out of my brain!
Gee Dave thanks for putting all those songs back into our heads we hoped were gone forever. Even though I have to disagree with some of the songs he trashed but most of them right on the money. But one thing that I found odd was it sounded like he gets so excited when he hears a Beach Boys song on the radio that he pees his pants. Sorry Dave (and all Beach Boys fans out there) but talk about weenie music The Beach Boys fall right into that class. Yes there is a few songs (2) I like that they sing. Sorry again Dave but he hates Barry Manilow's "I write the songs" which was in fact was written by Bruce Johnston but drum roll "Bruce Johnston" was a member of yes you guessed it is in The Beach Boys off and on for many years again sorry Dave and all other Beach Boys fans. As for Terry Jacks "Season's in the sun" we would always change the chorus to "We had joy we had fun we had seasons in the sun but the cops had the guns and they shot us in the buns". But I think the worst song ever in the history of the world is Joan Jett and The Blackheads uh sorry The Blackhearts "I Love Rock-N-Roll". I'd rather have all my teeth knocked out with a hammer and then water boarded with lemon juice and then have a pitchfork jammed in my head and pushed down a flight of stairs and set on fire then to listen to it ever again. Or any song by them. It's bad enough just to have to type it out. And I'm definitely not making that up.P.S. I almost forgot Beep Beep by The Playmates. Now get that one out of your head.
There is no greater humor author in America than Dave Barry. I tell my friends he is our generation's Mark Twain. They scoff. What do they know? Dave Barry did not write Huckleberry Finn, I will grant you that. He might have written Tom Sawyer, had it not been already written. But no writer has captured the Zeitgeist of the boomer generation better than this man. I came across this book at a craft fair where there were long tables of used books. I had to sit down once I started to read it. I gave it to my sister while still at the fair and she has never returned it. I purchased the Kindle version to put some change in Dave's pocket so he can buy some real beer, and not the "lite" stuff. Dave gave me uncontrollable guffaws. When Dave Barry writes something, we realize we knew it all along and only needed someone to express for us what we knew. His insights are deceptive. Don't ever underestimate this man's insight into the beauty and folly of America and of our generation. For those who believe he is superficial and shallow, let me say this, "You are wrong." In future generations, Dave's writings will be studied closely as a window to our times. Dave Barry is a man of keen insight. I am not making this up!
This very short and readable book grew from a column Barry wrote in which he lamented the radio absence of so many songs he loved in his youth; along the way he took a swipe at a Neil Diamond song and received an enormous amount of mail attacking him for not appreciating Neil Diamond's genius. He got almost as much mail suggesting that there were worse songs in the world. This led him to ask his readers to send him their nominations for the worst song ever (there were parameters, such as it had to be accidentally bad, and it had to be a song people had actually heard). An avalanche of mail followed. He wrote two columns on the results, then decided there was enough material for a (slender) book. It's very, very funny (as in I disturbed the dog by laughing so hard), but does leave you susceptible to earworms.
Don't miss this, Barry fans, especially if you're contemporaries of his. You'll see songs dredged up here that you thought you'd forgotten about, but all the time they were lurking in the windmills of your mind. Some of them will be refreshing strolls down memory lane. Others will make your teeth hurt and keep you awake nights. But, thanks to Dave's unique commentary, you will laugh, most definitely. Update, May 2017: I ordered more copies of this from Amazon, to give as gifts. They were a huge hit. If you know people who remember this music as well as you do, consider sending them their own copy....they'll most likely love it, unless the re-exposure to lyrics from things like "Johnny Get Angry" causes brain-cell deterioration. Well...at least they'll be laughing when they're taken away.....
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